


all drama must remain onstage

by unseeliekey



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: AKA HELL, Alternate Universe - Hope's Peak Academy (Dangan Ronpa), F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Texting, Theater Kids, chat fic, theater club AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-03-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:27:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23111704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unseeliekey/pseuds/unseeliekey
Summary: backstage BOSS: yeah no one wants to join your theatersports group anyway aka hell on earthclown time: RUDEclown time: my beloved shumai will join me this time right!!!! <3 <3 <3lights camera AAAAH: aha no thanks, i still have nightmares from last yearlights camera AAAAH: when you were on such a high after the competition that you wouldn't stop shaking for almost two hours and then you passed out in a McDonalds at midnightis that a weed: i think that's more to do with the twelve energy drinks he chugged in the dressing room after taking a valiumclown time: BUT WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!is that a weed: but at what cost
Relationships: Chabashira Tenko/Yumeno Himiko, Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi, definitely some more im just not decided yet
Comments: 18
Kudos: 179





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> names!!!  
> clown time: kokichi  
> katherina did nothing wrong: tenko  
> tsutsu: tsumugi  
> Kaesette: kaede  
> please remember your props: kirumi  
> is that a weed: rantaro  
> backstage BOSS: kaito  
> lights camera AAAAH: shuichi  
> himiko, in all her quality: himiko  
> codpiece: miu  
> NOT A BABYSITTER: maki  
> worker bee: gonta  
> CATS 2019 ruined my life: ryoma  
> god watches: angie  
> IT crowd: kiibo  
> friends, classmates, theater snobs: korekiyo
> 
> and here's a little descriptor of what i imagine their roles to be, plus a little explanation of what they mean in AMATEUR theater. i am by no means a professional.  
> director: monokuma  
> lighting and sound: shuichi, kiibo, (kaede sometimes helps)  
> creative direction (set design, costumes and props): tsumugi, angie, korekiyo  
> stage manager (babysitter basically): kirumi, maki  
> stage hands (handles props and stuff, moves things to and from set): gonta, kaito, tenko  
> technical director (basically in charge of all the technical stuff- i imagine she oversees lighting and sound, too): miu  
> special effects: himiko (i just imagine shes got a special role of managing like glitter bombs and tricks set up and giving everything a bit more magic)  
> actors: kokichi, miu, kaito, tsumugi, kaede, gonta, angie, ryoma
> 
> and ofc all the others sub in as actors sometimes too! there's usual overlap from performance to performance- people who managed set will sometimes act as stagehands during performance, or the actors themselves might choose to direct and make costumes. I would imagine that everyone in this fic has performed before, at least once. (although some are still shy)

_**open chat: all drama must remain onstage** _

**tsutsu:** HEY SO

 **tsutsu:** seeing as we're all back at school and drama club has started up again, I thought I'd revive this chat so we can discuss practice and stuff!

 **kaesette** : we've?? been using the chat?? all summer???

 **tsutsu:** welcome back everyone!

 **kaesette:** school started two weeks ago???????

 **clown time:** yeah but OBVIOUSLY it doesnt count until drama starts up again GOD

 **is that a weed:** guys im so excited we've got so many things scheduled this year

 **tsutsu:** right????? we're grown-up second years now!!! we've got this in the BAG we're gonna win everything

 **clown time:** I CALL DIBS ON ORGANIZING THE THEATERSPORTS GROUP AGAIN

 **please remember your props:** No need. We all know it'll consist of you, Rantaro, Miu, and Tenko. Probably with Ryoma getting dragged in as a substitute to make up numbers.

 **backstage BOSS:** yeah no one wants to join your theatersports group anyway aka hell on earth

 **clown time:** RUDE

 **clown time:** my beloved shumai will join me this time right!!!! <3 <3 <3

 **lights camera AAAAH** : aha no thanks, i still have nightmares from last year

 **lights camera AAAAH:** when you were on such a high after the competition that you wouldn't stop shaking for almost two hours and then you passed out in a McDonalds at midnight

 **is that a weed:** i think that's more to do with the twelve energy drinks he chugged in the dressing room after taking a valium

 **clown time:** BUT WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **is that a weed** : but at what cost

 **tsutsu** : oh yeah I forgot we've got theatersports again this year!

 **clown time** : how dare you

 **tsutsu:** so we've got the theatersports competition, the school play, the cultural festival, shakespeare society.... what else?

 **kaesette:** wait when you say school play do you mean the one we have to write and direct ourselves or the one where we get to just pick a play?

 **tsutsu:** ......

 **tsutsu:** okay so we have theatersports, the school play this term, the cultural festival, shakespeare society, the school play for the end of year ceremony that we have to write and direct ourselves

 **himiko and all her quality:** oh god just reading that made me tired

 **kaesette:** hey at least you don't have to do anything for theatersports!

 **himiko and all her quality:** WE HAVE TO PUT ON A PLAY BY THE END OF TERM FUCK

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** its ok himiko! i'll help you!!!!

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** how are you going to help backstage when you're performing......

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** don't fucking underestimate me degenerate

 **clown time:** HEY 

**clown time:** im the only one who can threaten shuichi!!!! >:((

 **codpiece:** >threaten

 **codpiece:** >5'1

 **codpiece:** >doubt

 **clown time:** >:(((( this is cyberbullying

 **tsutsu:** anyway! it's ok, himiko, we'll just rely on the director for this first one ^w^

 **himiko and all her quality:** thanks that makes me feel worse

 **clown time:** no offense but monokuma could die and i'd be happy

 **tsutsu:** he's not THAT BAD

 **clown time:** :/

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** :/

 **himiko and all her quality:** :/

 **tsutsu** : ok i get it

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** guys can you please fucking stop texting i saw enough of you in class today

 **clown time** : and just think how much more you'll see of us in rehearsal at lunch!!!

 **kaesette:** huh suddenly i don't want to do theater this year

 **clown time:** >:((((

 **backstage BOSS:** oooooooooooh owned

\--

_**open chat: all drama must remain onstage** _

**worker bee:** ah! gonta just wants to say how exciting it is to be back!

 **worker bee:** gonta is looking forward to rehearsal today :D

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** gonta i would die for you

 **worker bee:** please don't!!!

 **backstage BOSS:** eyy gonta are you ready to get this motley crew running like a machine again?

 **worker bee:** yes!! gonta has been practicing using his strength to move boxes all summer!

 **backstage BOSS:** b.....bro...

 **backstage BOSS:** that's so manly of u

 **codpiece:** keep it in ur pants jesus

 **backstage BOSS:** IDINDT EMAN IT LKIE TATHT

 **worker bee:** gonta appreciates the compliment!

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** can we not keep ONE THING pure here????

 **codpiece:** no

 **backstage BOSS:** no

 **clown time:** no

 **worker bee:** no :(

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** one day im gonna quit.

 **NOT A BABYSITTER** : guys its still fucking class can you please stop texting

 **clown time** : just turn off notifications lol

 **NOT A BABYSITTER** : i can sense your bad vibes either way.

 **backstage BOSS:** vibechecked by harumaki

 **clown time:** c y b e r b u l l i e s

 **worker bee: D:** is kokichi sad or lying?

 **backstage BOSS:** lying

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** lying

 **clown time:** cant it be both???

 **worker bee:** gonta hopes you feel better soon!

 **clown time:** ..........dammit

 **clown time:** im cured

 **worker bee:** :D

\----

**_open chat: all drama must remain onstage_ **

**himiko in all her quality:** what time is rehearsal again

 **kaesette:** l...lunch time

 **kaesette:** like five minutes from now

 **himiko in all her quality:** FRICK I THOUGHT IT WAS AFTER SCHOOL

 **kaesette:** NO THATS FRIDAYS

 **himiko in all her quality:** IM IN THE COURTYARD!!!!!!!

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** ITS OK HIMIKO!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM COMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **lights camera AAAA!:** the courtyard and the hall are like twenty minutes apart though....

 **kaesette:** rip lesbeans

 **god watches:** atua says he believes they can make it!

 **clown time:** lunch starts in 4 minutes lmao atua is wrong

 **lights camera AAAA!:** technically, we have a ten minute grace period to get to the hall for rehearsal, and tenko is particularly swift

 **lights camera AAAA!:** I definitely think she'd be able to make it on her own, I just wonder how fast himiko can run....

 **god watches:** its ok girls, i'll stall monokuma!!

 **himiko in all her quality:** THANKS ANGIE

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** YGSNLKD SMGOE

 **please remember your props:** And on that note, lunch has begun, and the rest of you should begin making your way to the hall.

 **IT crowd:** holy fuck

 **IT crowd:** i check my phone after ONE DAY of class and I have over 99 messages what the fuck is wrong with you guys

 **codpiece:** ok some of those are dms from me

 **IT crowd:** HOW MANY??????

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** this is why I put my phone on silent as soon as classes started.

 **clown time:** _@lights camera AAAAH!_ come walk me to hall!

 **lights camera AAAAH!** : ok, where are you

 **clown time:** west block

 **clown time:** level 2

 **lights camera AAAAH:** oh god you're miles away

 **clown time:** :,(

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** .............okay im coming

 **tsutsu:** ....[eyes emoji]

 **kaesette:** FFUCK i left my bag in class

 **is that a weed:** leave it

 **is that a weed:** drama is more important

 **kaesette:** usami already locked up so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ guess i'll die

 **backstage BOSS:** HA me and maki roll got here first

 **NOT A BABYSITTER** : no thanks to you.

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** right behind ya

 **please remember your props** : I'll be there soon.

 **clown time:** me n shumai stopped for drinks lol but we'll be there in a min

 **is that a weed:** *chihiro voice* im in

 **kaesette:** god that was a dumb joke

 **kaesette:** anyway im here too where's monokuma?

 **god watches:** atua saw him leaving the staffroom when we passed by!

 **tsutsu:** here, sorry!

 **god watches** : herehecomes.jpg

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** KOKICHI MADE ME CARRY HIM UP THREE FLIGHTS OF STAIRS

 **clown time:** it's just training

 **clown time:** i thought if we did it you could skip it with kaito later 

**clown time:** nishishi~

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** every time you type that goddamned laugh it takes years off my life.

 **codpiece:** 'did it' lol

 **backstage BOSS:** HEY shuichi wont skip right? he's MY sidekick

 **lights camera AAAAH!** : im going to die tm

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** i, too, am here, with ryoma and kirumi.

 **god watches:** present~!

 **IT crowd:** i saw monokuma just before i got here, he's right down the hall!

 **kaesette:** so i guess that's all of us except.....

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** rip tenko and himiko

 **is that a weed:** they were too gay for us. we were truly blessed by their presence.

 **codpiece:** WAIT IM NOT THERE YET EITHER FUCK

 **kaesette:** hssdndksklfhfjksk omg miu

 **codpiece:** W A I T

 **clown time:** boo you whore

 **clown time:** maybe if you weren't so fashnkdslallsa'afmsl

 **codpiece:** ????????

 **backstage BOSS:** OMG

 **codpiece:** WHAT

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** TENKO JUST FUCKING SLID INTO THE HALL 

**lights camera AAAAH!:** TWO STEPS AHEAD OF MONOKUMA 

**lights camera AAAAH!:** HIMIKO ON HER SHOULDERS

 **clown time:** he looks so pissed omg

 **kaesette** : GUYS PUT YOUR PHONES AWAY

 **codpiece:** WAIT HOLD ON

 **codpiece:** IM COMING

 **codpiece:** FUCK

\--

_**open chat: all drama must remain onstage** _

**katherina did nothing wrong:** tch. you should have believed in us more.

 **himiko, in all her quality:** my speed magic boosted tenko's power!

 **himiko, in all her quality:** but... thank you for carrying me

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** hsdjkahdkslka

 **clown time:** gay

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** shut it

 **kaesette:** so!!!!!! it's time to start thinking of plays!!!

 **backstage BOSS:** isn't it way too early? 

**backstage BOSS:** we've got until the end of term

 **kaesette:** we've ONLY got until the end of term

 **kaesette:** suggestions?

 **himiko, in all her quality:** midsummer night's dream!!

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** yesss that would be so cool! you'd make a perfect fairy himiko!!!

 **himiko, in all her quality:** ah.....

 **kaesette:** that's a good idea! we do have shakespeare society later on, though!

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** maybe we could look into something more traditional, like kabuki theater? or we could even go back and try something with a chorus?

 **kaesette:** ooh, that's really good, we should definitely consider it

 **clown time:** BACGDJSAE

 **clown time:** BACCHAE

 **clown time:** LET'S DO THE BACCHAE I WANT TO BE DIONYSUS

 **kaesette:** no.

 **clown time:** why not??????

 **kaesette:** because it's major themes include, and are not limited to: cults, alcoholism, violence; and it ends with a man in drag being torn apart by his mother and her friends

 **clown time** : and?

 **god watches:** i don't want to watch kokichi play a false god, either :/

 **backstage BOSS:** doesn't he do that anyway?

 **clown time:** hEY

 **tsutsu:** let's do hamilton

 **is that a weed:** no

 **tsutsu:** understandable have a good day

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** what about another musical? heathers is really popular atm

 **god watches:** you just want an excuse for hot girls to dance aggressively at you

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** hsjdskalsall yeah

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** waiting for godot

 **backstage BOSS:** of course you'd be into that

 **codpiece:** CATS

 **kaesette:** no

 **kaesette:** to both, waiting for godot has like.... six active characters if we push it and it's not the right tone for a school play

 **codpiece:** and CATS isn't??????

 **is that a weed:** what about the starlight express

 **kaesette:** NO

 **clown time** : who put miss bossypants in charge?

 **kaesette:** you all did, when you voted me as club president?

 **clown time:** well _I_ voted for shuichi

 **please remember your props:** What about the stage adaptation of Dracula? Or perhaps the Great Comet?

 **kaesette:** ooh, those could be fun!

 **tsutsu:** stage adaptation of ouran highschool host club?

 **kaesette:** NO

 **worker bee:** gonta is not fussy! gonta likes acting, but doesn't mind doing mainly stagehand jobs.

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** gonta i will have you onstage if it kills me

 **worker bee:** :D 

**IT crowd:** I think Be More Chill could be a fun musical to put on

 **codpiece:** you just like it because it has robots

 **IT crowd:** NOT TRUE

 **IT crowd:** ....i also like the music

 **kaesette:** noted, gonta! i'll definitely make sure there's a role for you :)

 **kaesette:** and i'll throw that on the list, kiibo!

 **backstage BOSS:** hey _@NOT A BABYSITTER_ , any suggestions?

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** ....

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** maybe oliver twist?

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** I don't like it myself, I just think it suits what Kaede might be asking for.

 **clown time:** suuuuuure

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** do you want to die

 **kaesette:** good idea, maki!!!!

 **kaesette:** i'm making a list, i'll link it in our planning drive. i think we should decide in a week or so, but i'm still taking suggestions and then we can vote!

 **kaesette:** has everyone suggested something?

 **god watches:** angie doesn't mind! as long as there is something funny in it, to make her smile, and something sad as well. and lots of opportunities to paint new sets!

 **clown time:** _@lights camera AAAAH!_ hey tell us what you want to do

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** ah

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** well, everybody's already got really good suggestions

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** and i won't be performing anyway

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** but maybe the importance of being earnest?

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** i always liked that one

 **clown time:** OOOOOH I LOVE THAT PLAY

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** you do??

 **clown time:** yeah!!!!!!

 **please remember your props:** Oscar Wilde, correct?

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs** : Despite Wilde's more... unpleasant traits, his writing does stand the test of time. It's curious how literature sticks around like that

 **backstage BOSS:** wait what do you mean unpleasant

 **backstage BOSS:** do you mean because hes gay?

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** no, I meant more the antisemitism and pedophilia and the general racism that came with being english

 **backstage BOSS:** oh

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** yeah, maybe not a great suggestion, sorry!

 **kaesette:** well, as long as the play doesn't contain any of that, and we think about its author and the subject matter respectfully, i don't see why it can't be an option?

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** if we throw out any historical works for the sins of their writer, we may as well give up on performing anything written in any colonialist country. 

**himiko, in all her quality:** still, i wonder if it's,,,, like worth it. idk it seems disrespectful to ignore it

 **god watches:** atua is undecided on this.

 **kaesette:** okay, i'll put it on the list for now and if we decide to seriously consider it, we'll talk about the ethical implications and stuff- and same with the other plays, i guess. we should always do our research.

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** sorry!!

 **kaesette:** there's nothing wrong, shuichi!

\--

_**dms-** _

**phantom thief:** you should audition

 **phantom thief:** if the play goes through

 **phantom thief:** you'd make a great jack 

**detective:** ah

 **detective:** you think so?

 **phantom thief** : yeah!!

 **phantom thief:** and i'd be a great algernon >:)

 **detective:** lmao

 **detective:** i dont think it'll go through, though, which is fine! im not even performing, anyway.

 **phantom thief:** you should!

 **phantom thief;** even kii-boy performs sometimes

 **phantom thief:** let him and the pig manage the lights

 **detective:** kokichi.

 **phantom thief:** *miu

phantom thief: but im serious!!!

 **phantom thief:** i wanna perform with you

\--

_**dms-** _

**shoeichi:** sssdndjnskcbnsmnaklsndskka

 **kaeday:** you good?

 **shoeichi:** boy

 **shoeichi** : cute

 **kaeday:** ahhhhh

 **kaeday:** what did he do now?

 **shoeichi:** OK FIRST OF ALL

 **shoeichi:** when i picked him up for rehearsal? he was super clingy and he had his arms so tight around my shoulders and i was actually dying but i never wanted to put him down

 **shoeichi:** then???? in rehearsal????? did you see how he kept trying to pair up with me?????

 **kaeday:** uh huh

 **shoeichi:** and we pretended to be a married couple when we were playing space jump and i dhsjjakmasla

 **shoeichi:** and NOW he says he wants me to audition bc he wants to perform with me???????

 **kaeday:** shuichi.

 **kaeday:** shuichi i love you and i think you're brilliant and it amazes me how well you can read people and figure them out

 **kaeday:** i just dont understand how you're so fucking dense when it comes to kokichi

 **shoeichi:** what do you mean?

 **kaeday:** BOI

 **kaeday:** HE OBVIOUSLY LIKES YOU

 **shoeichi:** ah, no, i think he's just teasing

 **kaeday:** IS2G 

\--

**_open chat: all drama must remain onstage_ **

**IT crowd:** me n shuichi stayed behind after lunch to doublecheck the rig and stuff

 **IT crowd:** me: hey monokuma, i think someone screwed with the rig? some of the lights are missing and a few buttons are jammed and the end of it looks busted?

 **IT crowd:** monokuma: oh yeah we rented out the school hall over the summer

 **IT crowd:** me: but- but you told them they couldnt touch the rig right?

 **IT crowd:** monokuma: they can do what they liked with it, they rented the place

 **IT crowd:** shuichi: i think they broke it?????

 **IT crowd:** monokuma: then think of this as a training exercise and fix it!

 **IT crowd:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** press f to pay respects for the time me n kiibo are gonna have to spend fixing it

 **backstage BOSS:** f

 **kaesette:** f

 **god watches:** f

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** f

 **codpiece:** hey i can help! 

**clown time:** f

 **IT crowd:** really, miu? that would mean so much, thank you so much!!!!

 **codpiece:** no probs 

**codpiece** : lmk if you wanna.... reward me ;)

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** please no

 **backstage BOSS:** hey, i can hang around too if you need someone to move the lights and stuff?

 **IT crowd:** :,) yes please kaito

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** kaito i love you

 **backstage BOSS:** i know 

**backstage BOSS:** i figured neither of you have the strength to hold those up for more than a minute

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** HEY

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** I CARRIED KOKICHI UP THREE FLIGHTS OF STAIRS TODAY

 **backstage BOSS:** kokichi is tiny

 **kaesette:** doesn't count if you were piggybacking him

 **clown time:** OK IM NOT THAT SMALL

 **clown time:** IT WAS A NOBLE EFFORT PUT IN BY MY BELOVED SHUICHI

 **god watches:** okay 5 foot 1

 **backstage BOSS:** okay 'typecast as every munchkin in the wizard of oz'

 **codpiece:** okay 'played oliver twist at age 16'

 **clown time:** ONE TIME AND IT WAS FOR MONEY

 **kaesette:** rip kokichi

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** okay 'baby jesus every year in the nativity scene'

 **clown time:** SHUICHI NOT YOU TOO

 **clown time:** STOP BULLYING MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

 **kaesette:** okay, as much as i'd like to keep bullying kokichi, i've got a list of plays here

 **kaesette:** so far we're considering: (maybe a kabuki piece like maybe yoshitsune?), midsummer nights dream, the great comet, dracula, be more chill, oliver twist, importance of being earnest

 **kaesette:** link is on the drive btw

 **kaesette:** so i think we should decide maybe a week from now? and then play around with it for a few weeks before casting

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** sounds good kaede!

 **clown time:** ugh stop flirting

 **lights camera AAAAH!** : we're not!!!!!!

 **codpiece:** if i cant have you baby, if i cant have you baby~

 **clown time:** shut it

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** what about the misandrist?

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** before you say it there are parts for guys and its an excellent critique of feminism as well as the patriarchy and it's really clever and has good messages and i would die for jean betts

 **himiko in all her quality:** is that the one that also deals with themes of csa?

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** ...............

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** ok maybe not 

**clown time:** the bacchae is a classic piece of art and it has excellent chorus roles and i would make a GREAT dionysus

 **kaesette:** we are not developing a play purely so you can fulfill your cult leader fantasies

 **codpiece:** stick to ur kinky roleplay for that god

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** djsjajknsalls

 **clown time:** MY CURLS BELONG TO GOD

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** what about frogs?

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** by aristotle?

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** ...........aristophanes

 **clown time:** ooh yes!!!!!!!!

 **kaesette:** i haven't read it, but it's a comedy, right?

 **IT crowd:** oh, i studied it for classics last year! it's really light, it could work

 **worker bee:** gonta supports anything with frogs

 **kaesette:** i'll put it on the list, then! 

**himiko, in all her quality:** on the note of greek plays- maybe hadestown? :0

 **kaesette:** oh, i love that musical!

 **kaesette:** i just don't know if we have enough tenors....

 **tsutsu:** if we do anything greek im not making togas im going to make elaborate modern costumes i want to have fun too!!!

 **kaesette:** definitely! i love modernizing the classics :)

 **please remember your props:** I remember a recent performance of Much Ado About Nothing in suits and modern dress. It was rather striking.

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** another play to thrown on the list, maybe?

 **please remember your props:** Perhaps, but we do have the Shakespeare Society's contest later this year. And modernizing the script of one of Shakespeare's plays will be an excellent last resort for the performance we have to write and direct ourselves. I believe we should keep our options open.

 **codpiece:** but i love billy shakes!

 **tsutsu:** you just like the innuendo

 **codpiece:** lmao yeah

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** guys stop texting in class

 **NOT A BABYSITTER:** we can decide later, we have another club slot on friday

 **clown time:** there's never enough time for drama!

 **please remember your props:** *points to the sign that says 'ALL DRAMA MUST REMAIN ONSTAGE'*

 **tsutsu:** title drop, nice

 **kaesette:** is2g


	2. kokichis grand plan

_**open chat: all drama must remain onstage** _

**CATS 2019 ruined my life:** hopes peak more like hoe peak

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** i hate this fucking school

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** mood

 **kaesette:** did something happen?

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** if I hear the phrase 'super high school level' one more time im gonna kermit

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** just got lectured by a first year about how i should devote my fucking life to tennis or whatever

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** 'you're smoking???? how can you expect to be the ultimate super high school bullshit tennis player? you should be training!!!!'

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** first of all you look like your twelve, second of all i can do what i like, third of all, i hate this school

 **IT crowd:** *you're

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** kiibo if i kill myself its your fault

 **kaesette:** NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** ah, to be a first year

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** when all that mattered was mastering your talent and making the most of this prestigious school

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** and then you realize it's actually hell and they'll never expel you because they're secretly studying you and there is literally a super high school yakuza two years ahead of you

 **IT crowd:** hopes peak! what the fuck are we doing!

 **kaesette:** hey, it's not that bad! it's really good for setting up potential careers and networking, and they really let you nurture your talent :)

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** but what if i dont want to play tennis forever huh

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** what if i want to go to jail

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** then you'll be the super high school level prisoner

 **IT crowd:** don't joke about that that might be an actual thing

 **clown time** : sup guys i just spent three hours crying 

**lights camera AAAAH!:** you good?

 **clown time:** no

 **kaesette:** hey kokichi?

 **clown time** : yah

 **kaesette:** is your talent ACTUALLY being the supreme leader of evil?

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** *ultimate supreme leader of evil

 **clown time:** thx babe

 **clown time:** and uh??? kirumi is apparently assisting the prime minister at age 16 so??? i dont know why everyone gets on my ass???

 **clown time:** you were just talking about ultimate yakuza guy??? AND dont forget ultimate soldier and the ACTUAL SERIAL KILLER IN 78A

 **clown time:** I DONT UNDERSTAND HOW ITS SO HARD TO BELIEVE I RUN A TEN THOUSAND MEMBER EVIL ORGANIZATION

 **kaesette** : because you're a known liar

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** because you're not evil

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** because you're too much of a baby

 **clown time:** :,( cyyyberbbullty iingg......

\----

**_dms-_ **

**detective:** hey are you okay?

 **phantom thief:** no ur words cut me to the core

 **phantom thief:** how dare u accuse me of not being evil

 **detective:** i meant more the 3 hours crying but sure

 **phantom thief:** oh that

 **phantom thief:** yeah idk lmao i was just chilling

 **phantom thief:** listening to vocaloid

 **phantom thief:** lying on my floor

 **phantom thief:** pouring panta on myself

 **detective:** ........why

 **phantom thief:** it seemed poetic but it turned out just to be sticky

 **detective:** are you gonna head to class today?

 **phantom thief:** proooooobably not

 **detective:** want me to come over?

 **phantom thief:** ew, gross. please never set foot in my dorm room. i see enough of you already and it gives me a headache.

 **detective:** ....lies, right?

 **phantom thief:** yes omg just come over

\--

**_open chat: all drama must remain onstage_ **

**katherina did nothing wron** g: hi guys i have adhd and i hate classes i cant wait to go back to my lab

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** or rehearsal

 **codpiece:** mood

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** cant think about..... math..... too busy..... thinking about.......... potential plays........

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** im all buzzy

 **god watches:** me too!!!!!!

 **kaesette:** guys im so glad to be back, i really missed this

 **kaesette:** planning stuff with you all, complaining about monokuma...

 **codpiece:** screwing everything up the week before and magically having it all come together on opening night....

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** <3 <3 <3 im so excited

 **god watches:** atua says that this year is going to be spectacular!!!!

 **codpiece:** we're gonna fucking blow everyone away

 **codpiece:** hehe blow

 **kaesette:** AAAA i just want it to be friday already i want to get to rehearsal

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** I, too, share your sentiments

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** you ruined it

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs** : sorry.

 **god watches:** it's ok kiyo! ily

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** :^)

 **codpiece:** WHY DID YOU GIVE IT A NOSE

 **god watches:** cursed.

 **kaesette:** i want to do a musical this year!!!

 **tsutsu:** you always want to do a musical!

 **kaesette:** i love them!!!!!!!!!!

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** kaede i'd die for you

 **tsutsu:** rt

 **himiko, and all her quality:** rt

 **god watches:** rt

 **codpiece:** rt

 **kaesette:** guys :,)

 **codpiece:** kaede really is shsl lesbian huh

 **kaesette:** i could never steal tenko's title!!!!!!!!!

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** kaede i give it to you freely

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** this is my ultimate sacrifice for women

 **kaesette:** tenko..... you're so cute

 **katherina did nothing wrong:** HSNFNKJSKLKS:LS

 **himiko, and all her quality** : my girlfriend is so gay i love her

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** hopes peak girls are the only people who have rights

 **codpiece:** *and gonta

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** fuck youre right im so sorry gonta

 **tsutsu:** the absolute contrast between the purity and love that is class 79's ultimate lesbians and any other group of guys being the absolute Worst tm

 **tsutsu:** in this chat, i see beautiful girls talking and sharing love

 **tsutsu:** in the classroom i am in i see rantaro trying to get an upperclassman in a headlock because he said that he was looking forward to the play falling apart

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** what upperclassman and which classroom 

**CATS 2019 ruined my life:** asking for a friend

 **tsutsu:** byakuya (the twink one), east block room 6

 **codpiece:** omw

 **katherina and all her quality:** omw

 **kaesette:** uh guys can we please not murder the heir to the togami corp

 **CATS 2019 ruined my life:** no promises

\--

_**open chat: all drama must remain onstage** _

**IT crowd:** _@lights camera AAAAH!_ hey, do you think you could make some time after school to come and help me fix up the rig? 

**IT crowd:** and of course anyone who can actually help

 **clown time:** i'll come!!!!!!!

 **IT crowd:** no

 **clown time:** D,:

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** kokichi could come and give us witty anecdotes and drink panta and not touch anything?

 **IT crowd:** ...........i'll allow it but only bc it's you shuichi

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** thanks!

 **clown time:** UGH no thanks actually i dont want to listen to you guys flirting

 **IT crowd:** ....................................................is2g

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** we aren't!!!!!

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** we won't be!!!!

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** i mean you don't have to come but it'd be fun and we're not flirting!!!!!!!

 **codpiece:** i smelled drama and came as fast as i could

 **IT crowd:** miu save me

 **codpiece:** oh i'll DEFINITELY be there to help : )

 **IT crowd:** im afraid

 **clown time:** ok i'll come too ig

 **clown time:** if you're so desperate shumai

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** i'm not! i dont mean to make you uncomfortable or anything, i just thought it'd be nice to all hang out

 **clown time:** nishishishi just kidding

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** years off my life, kokichi

 **clown time:** what when i do this? 

**clown time:** ~𝓃𝒾𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓈𝒽𝒾~~~

 **codpiece:** I CAN HEAR IT

 **IT crowd:** CURSED

 **clown time:** ~̷̠͈̒̂̀́ͅņ̵̢̓̆̈́į̴s̵̘̾̃͑ͅh̶̫̽̅͐̃i̷̡͚̚s̸̠̞̒͒͜h̷̢̊̒̈͂i̷̱͚̘̇s̵͔̅̒͛͊h̶̢͐͋ǐ̵̼̅̉~̶͎̪͗͜~̶̝̾͂~̸͙̘̹̣̋̇̓͘

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** i have suddenly contracted lung cancer. please complete whatever native religious rituals you feel are best.

 **god watches:** o̴̢̡̠͍͊̾w̸̺͔͎̍͝O̷͚̻͆͐

 **codpiece:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

 **is that a weed:** why is shuichi hiding in the boys bathroom and staring at his phone, shaking

 **IT crowd:** scroll up

 **is that a weed:** ah

 **clown time:** WHAT _@lights camera AAAAH!_ GET BACK HERE I STILL HAVE TIKTOKS TO SHOW YOU

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** sorry i was trying to plan what to bring to fix the lights!

 **codpiece:** X doubt

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** ill be right back!

 **clown time:** ok good im lonely

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** im coming as fast as i can!

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** awh

 **codpiece:** thsAY'SD WWGVAT SJE DSASID 

**friends, classmates, theater snobs:** aaaaand you ruined it. 

**IT crowd:** are we all just ignoring that kokichi has a tiktok

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** yes.

 **codpiece:** dude kokichi MAKES tiktoks how do you not know this

 **codpiece:** you're in some of them

 **IT crowd:** W H A T

 **IT crowd:** _@clown time_ EXPLAIN

 **clown time:** watching vids with a hot detective, catch me later

 **IT crowd:** WHAT AM I DOING IN THEM????

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** there's one where you're chasing after a roomba, yelling 'I'VE MADE IT SENTIENT, I'VE MADE IT SENTIENT'

 **IT crowd:** wait do you have a tiktok korekiyo???

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** i find it fascinating.

 **codpiece:** oh there's one where kokichi goes 'nerd roommate cheeeck' and then he steals your homework and runs out to the bathroom and flushes it while you chase after him, screaming

 **IT crowd:** THAT WAS ALMOST EIGHT MONTHS AGO!!!!!

 **codpiece:** lmao yeah you guys didnt last long as roommates huh

 **IT crowd:** HE PUT THAT ONLINE???

 **codpiece:** yea it was pretty funny lmao

 **IT crowd:** SURELY IT'S AGAINST THE TERMS OF SERVICE TO POST VIDEOS OF SOMEONE UNKNOWINGLY ONTO THEIR APP???????

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs** : terms of service agreements are often treated more as suggestion than hard and fast rules, according to what will make a company the most money.

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** capitalism is a flawed, yet beautiful ruse.

 **please remember your props:** ~~This is why you support your local unions.~~

 **codpiece:** MOM SDSKJDKKSLDJSJKSKL

 **please remember your props:** I said nothing.

 **backstage BOSS:** this drama club needs a crew union

 **IT crowd:** a crewnion, if you will

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** i won't.

 **backstage BOSS:** all the actors getting all the credit smh

 **backstage BOSS:** underpaid and unappreciated backstage proletariat

 **codpiece:** wow, i didn't think you could spell that, kaito!

 **backstage BOSS:** SHUT THE FUCK UP

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** none of us are paid? and most of us double as actors as well as working behind the scenes, with the exception of shuichi, maki, and often kiibo and kirumi?

 **IT crowd:** but I've performed in a few things when miu took over the lights for a bit!

 **please remember your props:** I'm perfectly happy managing things backstage. I find it quite exciting.

 **backstage BOSS:** RIGHT??? it's almost better than performing, waiting for all the cues, reciting the lines, dancing backstage, running around and helping people and saving the day

 **backstage BOSS:** i love the frenzy, and you're never bored

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** one minute he's complaining, and the next he's overjoiced....

 **please remember your props:** It's the dramatic blood in him.

 **codpiece:** i wanna do lights more tbh

 **codpiece:** you really feel like you're enhancing the experience, like i get it

 **IT crowd:** i wouldn't mind if you wanted to swap with me for a few performances? i could probably double as a backstage tech and i wouldn't mind being onstage

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** ACTUALLY YOU SHOULD LET ME SWAP AND PERFORM I'M A TALENTED ACTOR AND I DESERVE TO BE ONSTAGEHEJDDUDSJKDKKLSLSSJK

 **please remember your props:** Shuichi?

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** sorry, kokichi stole my phone!!!!!

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** i like doing lights and sound, if kiibo wants to switch up a bit that's fine! i don't mind at all :)

 **backstage BOSS:** i hate to say it but the clown has a point

 **backstage BOSS:** you should be onstage more bro

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** nah, we don't have enough techs to justify it really

 **codpiece:** bullshit, we've got three, kirumi can do fucking anything and maki can take over from her, and i could always convince 77s mechanic to help

 **please remember your props:** Indeed, Maki is more than capable of managing without me, and the new experience would be enlightening, if you would forgive the pun.

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** but there's no need, because i'm happy doing lights and sound!!

 **clown time:** (he's shy)

 **backstage BOSS:** brooooooooooo cmon you're a good actor

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** just in warm ups and games and filling in for people, that's different from performing onstage, in front of a crowd, and you know it!! i have zero projection ability

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** that can always be learned.

 **friends, classmates, theater snobs:** besides, I remember a particularly good performance with you as kaede's understudy last year?

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** no it ruined the whole thing, her hamlet was so good and a lot of people were coming because they wanted to see a female hamlet anyway and i let them down

 **clown time:** shuichi you were GREAT, kaede was so happy with you 

**clown time:** plus it was super fun to perform with you! you've got great stage energy

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** guys, no, i'm sorry. i'm happy to work as an understudy again but i think i'm safer in the box

 **backstage BOSS:** if you're sure, bro :(

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** i just don't have strong feelings about performing like you guys do. i like techincal work, but i wouldn't want to take a role away from someone who would care about it more

 **please remember your props:** That's understandable, Shuichi.

 **IT crowd:** you're a great technician anyway :)

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** thanks!

\--

_**Kokichi Ouma has created a chat.** _

_**Kokichi Ouma has added 14 people.** _

_**Kokichi Ouma has changed their name to mastermind.** _

**mastermind** : so i think we all know the plan, right?

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** ????

 **mastermind:** check main chat

 **Kaito Momota:** i've got no clue what's going on

 **Tenko Chabashira:** not unusual

 **Kirumi Tojo:** The plan is to get Shuichi to learn an understudy role and then for the original actor to pretend to fall ill, correct?

 **mastermind:** bazinga!

 **Miu Iruma:** please never say that again oh god im shaking

 **mastermind:** but in my plan, they fake sick in a way where they lose their voice but can still help out backstage so they dont have to miss out completely you know?

 **Kaito Momota:** oh, i wouldn't mind doing that, then? i'll get shuichi to help me with my lines, and he'll learn them himself because he's a nerd, and then i'll pretend to get a cold and he'll never suspect a thing!

 **mastermind:** can't believe i'm saying this, but nice, kaito.

 **Kaito Momota:** BD

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** idk guys, it seems a bit shifty going behind shuichi's back like this

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** he seemed pretty uncomfortable in the main chat

 **Miu Iruma:** but don't you remember how much fun he had last year? he got thrust into playing the lead role in a play with less than a day to prepare, and he had a great time. he was smiling for days afterward.

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** i know, i just don't think it's right to trick him into it

 **Korekiyo Shinguuji:** look, clearly he has some kind of hangup around performance. i'm not entirely sure if any of us are qualified to get into that.

 **Maki Harukawa:** it's just general anxiety, right?

 **Maki Harukawa:** i really feel like we could talk this out with him.

 **mastermind:** no, too boring.

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** Kokichi!

 **mastermind:** 'talk this out with him' ? it's shuichi. that boy is tighter-lipped than me when it comes to his problems. you'll never get there.

 **mastermind:** besides, you're all wrong about the source of his problems.

 **Kaito Momota:** what do you mean?

 **mastermind:** evidence A: "i just don't have strong feelings about performing like you guys do. i like techincal work, but i wouldn't want to take a role away from someone who would care about it more"

 **mastermind:** shuichi isn't worried about performance, he's worried about us.

 **Tenko Chabashira:** i don't get it.

 **mastermind:** shuichi was one of the last ones to properly join last year, right? he kinda got dragged in by kaito and harukawa. i think he still feels like a bit of an outsider, and he probably has a general impression that we care about theater more than he does (probably at least partially due to how excited we were about it starting up again. i think that's definitely contributing.) furthermore, he also underestimates the work he does, all the time, but especially here, and i think that's led to an idea that we all 'deserve' it more than he does? 

**mastermind:** shuichi isn't anxious about performing, you saw how well he handled that. he's anxious about taking roles away from us, or about 'stealing the spotlight', so to speak. i think he's more afraid of signing up than anything else. 

**Kaede Akamatsu** : .........

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** that was a frighteningly in-depth analysis

 **mastermind:** i can do you next, if you like? :3c

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** NO THANKS

 **mastermind:** anyway, evidence B: "her hamlet was so good and a lot of people were coming because they wanted to see a female hamlet anyway and i let them down"

 **Miu Iruma:** so he's worried about letting the audience down, too?

 **mastermind:** no you ignorant slut

 **Miu Iruma:** S-SLUT???

 **Maki Harukawa:** there she goes.

 **mastermind:** that's a concept we discussed a lot when we were developing the show. how to treat genderbent hamlet. shuichi probably misinterpreted that as 'one of the most important things in this show is hamlet's gender'. he was worried that he let US down by failing to live up to how we had imagined it. plus, there's an added layer of guilt there about stealing the role from kaede, probably

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** foolish boy, he was wonderful.

 **Miu Iruma:** do you remember how much he apologized about the 'get thee to a nunnery' bit lol

 **Kaito Momota:** shuichi, backstage, whispering: 'MIU IM SORRY IM SO SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO YELL I JUST GOT CAUGHT UP IN IT'

 **Kaito Momota:** kaede, literally next performance: *slaps mius ass as they head backstage* nice work, whore

 **Tenko Chabashira:** AHSHAKAKASBHDSJAKLA

 **Miu Iruma:** >w< kaede can take me to a nunnery anytime

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** *bows*

 **mastermind:** ok yes we get it shuichi is a beta cuck and kaede is an alpha lesbian can we please just agree with my plan already

 **Miu Iruma:** what does it say about you if you want to fuck a beta cuck?

 **mastermind:** w-what? uwu you've somehow discovered my l-love for shuichi?? h-how could this h-happen??? uwu my p-poor heart can't t-take it uwu 

**mastermind:** jk shuichi is an emo embarrassment and i just want to get him onstage bc hes a good performer

 **Rantaro Amami:** sure, "wrote his creative writing project about a detective chasing a phantom thief and capturing him in a dark room and grabbing him by his wrists, looking with his dark gold eyes and a slightly shy smirk even with all the power he holds and then the story grew too homoerotic and you got called up after class and it's REALLY obvious who you're projecting onto"

_**mastermind has deleted the chat.** _

\--

_**open chat: all drama must remain onstage** _

**is that a weed** : huh

 **kaesette:** what happened? i saw you send a message and then i got told the chat didn't exist anymore?

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** wait what chat?

 **clown time:** oh we were just trying to convince kaede to put on a christmas carol

 **lights camera AAAAH!:** it's? not christmas?

 **clown time:** that's what would make it so iconic

\--

**_dms-_ **

**under pressure:** ok but plan is a go, right?

 **im a rocket ship on my way to mars** : oh hell yeah

 **im a rocket ship on my way to mars:** soon as i find out what we're putting on, i'll start pestering him about what i should audition for

 **under pressure:** nice

 **im a rocket ship on my way to mars:** did you really hand in a gay fanfiction about you and shuichi for your creative writing assignment

 **under pressure:** i will literally kill you.

**Author's Note:**

> woop woop woop watch me swing into a fandom three years late. anyway hi this is a hopes peak au where they're all in drama club together and its gay.  
> if you have any strong feelings about stuff you'd want to see them perform, casting, or other theater related events, let me know! this is kind of a de-stress fic that i'll probably update weekly or so to vent my frustrations with my actual drama lessons lmao. its all fun performance here and NO FUCKING TECHNICAL BREATHING EXERCISES AND 4 MINUTE TALKS  
> anyway suggest plays and stuff!!!!! and be nice to ur stage manager and remember that directors dont have rights


End file.
